When you meet someone new and you can’t take your hands off each other, it’s exciting. The mere thought of seeing him again causes butterflies to flutter in your stomach.
But how do you know if he’s truly in love or just lusting after you?
You don’t want to find out that he’s just hot and bothered and not committed when you’re looking for something long-term.
Attraction and chemistry are essential ingredients for long-term love. They are, however, not the only ingredients that are important. In order for love to last, there must be more between the two of you than a mutual turn-on. Are there any dating red flags that you can look for to tell the difference between lust and love? How do you tell if he’s just lusting after you or if it’s true love?
Here are signs he’s in lust with you but not in love:
He moves things along at a breakneck pace
He’s going all-in on you, calling, texting, sending flowers, and declaring his love by the second date. He wants to start dating you right away and marry you within a week.
This guy is falling for a fantasy version of you, not the real you. Try to slow him down and set your own pace. If he can’t make the change, he’s not your man.
Remember that it is entirely up to you to dictate the pace of the relationship.
He appears to be only interested in what’s between the sheets
Do you find yourself in bed before you even leave the house, missing the start of the movie? Is his idea of a date to make sure you drink enough to let your inhibitions go? Do you spend more time together when you’re not dressed than when you are?
If the two of you aren’t going out into the world with other people and only end up in the sack, it’s possible that this is nothing more than pure animal lust.
This may be entertaining for a short time, but it will not be satisfying in the long run.
He only contacts you at the last minute
A guy who wants to be in a relationship with you will want to set up a date with you ahead of time. He’ll want to schedule time with you when other guys can’t.
He’ll want to book you for next week or even plan a trip with you a few months in advance to spend some quality time with you.
The guy who texts you last minute to “hang out” isn’t interested in anything other than hooking up with you.
If you tell him you’re already booked and that you’ll only contact him to schedule in advance, he’ll move on to someone who doesn’t mind making things easy for him.
He does not emotionally open up to you
Is he eager to share his sexual fantasies with you but unwilling to share his heart or allow himself to be vulnerable? If this is the case, he is most likely not emotionally ready for a relationship.
He’s not going to suddenly open up and become the kind of man you want him to be. If you want to be in a relationship where you can experience both emotional and physical intimacy, don’t ignore this dating red flag.
He’s too impatient to wait for you
You may find him very attractive, but you may not be ready to jump into bed with a stranger right away. If he won’t wait for you to feel more at ease sharing yourself with him, he’s only interested in sex.
A man who truly cares about you will wait for you because he knows you’re worth it. Don’t squander your time or succumb to peer pressure to be intimate before you’re ready.
He doesn’t respect your boundaries
Is he unannounced and expects you to be available? Is he pushing you to be intimate and refusing to take no for an answer?
If he can’t respect your boundaries and disregards your wishes, he’s not interested in you or in a relationship. He’s just seeing how much he can get out of you.
He doesn’t want to deal with your emotions
He has no idea how to deal with you when you’re upset. When things become uncomfortable, he’ll simply get up and leave.
A man who likes you will want to assist you. When you’re upset, he’ll try to make you feel better. He may even offer to hold you and provide a safe space for you to simply feel whatever you’re feeling.